Choosing the Hard Path There comes a time in your life where you have to make the hard decision: do I keep going down the path I’m on just because it’s familiar? Or do I take the path that might actually help me—no matter how unknown or scary it feels? That was where I was a couple of months ago when I finally decided to get assessed for autism. When I started seeing a therapist again. When I met with a psychiatrist for the first time. When I began taking an SSRI and anxiety meds—ones that, if I didn’t truly need them, could have seriously harmed me. Let that sink in. But here I am. It’s August 2nd, 2025. Honestly, I didn’t think I’d live to see this day. And nearly didn’t—more than once. One of those times was by my own hands. I know, right? Messed up. But hey, I did just say I’m on meds. Dark humor helps sometimes. I want you to know—it does get easier. Not perfect. Not some magical Hollywood moment where the clouds part and you become a brand new person. That’s...

More Words Than Ever: A Day of Hope, Hurt, and Holding On Today was really weird. It’s hard to explain—really hard. I’ve talked more today than I think I’ve talked my entire life, lol. I know I was with John, and he’s one of my safe people, but even then, I usually don’t say much. Something’s shifting, I think. And I truly believe the sertraline is helping. I know it’s just Day 15, and I shouldn’t get my hopes up. But I can’t help it. If things keep going like this… who knows? I’ve even been smiling more. Jennifer noticed during our last session. And today both Xander and Ryan told me I seemed happier. I guess I do. Sometimes I wish I could just know what I’m feeling without having to think so hard about it. Alexithymia makes that so difficult. Like… yeah, I can smile and feel okay in the moment, but then later I’m left wondering, “What was that feeling? Was that happiness?” It’s frustrating not to be able to tell in real time. I want to understand myself more easily. It’s exhau...