The Day the Beeping Broke Me

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Have you ever been stuck in a place where the noise feels like it’s crawling under your skin? That was me today.

I had to do inventory at the Hwy 58 store in Chattanooga, TN. The scanners beeped nonstop. It felt like every beep punched through my head until I had a migraine. I don’t even remember the 30-mile drive back to my home store in Cleveland, TN. My brain was running on empty autopilot.

Right now, I’m sitting at my home store trying to ground myself. My body is so tense it hurts. And the worst part? I didn’t have my Loop earplugs. No stim toys. Nothing. I’m holding back tears because I’m not home yet.

I’m writing this because sometimes being autistic means our bodies remember every sound, every flicker of fluorescent light, every vibration—long after it’s over. And sometimes we forget that we do deserve to protect ourselves, even if it means carrying a pocketful of stim toys or wearing earplugs people might ask about.

If today taught me anything, it’s this: bring your supports. Don’t wait for a meltdown to remember you need them.

Tonight, when I get home, I’m letting myself decompress. Weighted blanket. Buc-ee. Slow breaths. And maybe some tears that have been waiting to fall.

Because that’s okay too.

🌙If you’re like me—autistic, sensitive, or just human—please remember:
Bring your supports. Plan your recovery. And let yourself feel it afterward.

We don’t have to be tough all the time. Softness is strength too. 🩵

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