Why Do So Many Autistic People Look Younger Than We Are?

Why Do So Many Autistic People Look Younger Than We Are?

It’s something I’ve noticed in myself and in others in the neurodivergent community — we often get mistaken for being younger than we are. I’ll be working, joking around, or just smiling off into space, and someone will say, “You look like a kid again.” At first, I thought it was just me. But the more autistic people I met, the more I saw it wasn’t just a coincidence. There’s something deeper going on.

So I started digging into it. Is it neurological? Is it sensory? Is it how we show up in the world? Turns out… it’s kind of all of the above.

🧠 Neurological Expression

Autistic people often express emotions, tone, and body language differently. Our faces may be more neutral, animated, or expressive in ways that resemble younger people. Some of us smile big, use playful tones, or stim with joy — and neurotypicals read that as childlike. But really, it’s just authentic expression.

🧍‍♂️ Not Masking into "Adult Coding"

A lot of adulthood is learned behavior — posture, clothing, makeup, tone, social masks. Many autistic folks either can’t or choose not to follow those norms. We prioritize comfort, authenticity, and joy. That can make us look or seem younger simply because we aren’t performing adulthood the same way.

🧬 Stress, Cortisol, and the Body

Chronic stress ages the body. Some autistic people may have different stress responses or avoid social stressors early in life. If we don’t engage in stress-heavy behaviors or environments, it may preserve our youthful looks. Others, like me, who have masked or burned out, may still carry that youthfulness despite the internal toll.

🧴 Sensory-Driven Self-Care

Avoiding the sun, certain fabrics, harsh chemicals, and staying consistent with routines — all of these are sensory choices, but they also double as anti-aging habits. If we’re drawn to what feels good and avoid what feels overwhelming, that can end up being good for our bodies long-term.

🧑‍🎨 Childlike Wonder Never Left

Whether it’s a stim toy in our pocket, cartoons that still make us laugh, or hyperfixating on a special interest like dragons or history, many of us never lost that connection to childlike joy. That spark — that playfulness — it keeps us glowing in a way the world reads as “young.” But to us, it’s just being who we are.

So yeah, it’s not all in our heads — we really do look younger, and it’s a mix of neurology, authenticity, and how we relate to the world around us. We live differently. And sometimes, that difference shines through in the most unexpected ways.

From one ageless autistic soul to another — keep smiling. Keep being you.