Life Update: July Check-In 🌱
Life Update: July Check-In 🌱
Hey everyone,
It’s been a minute since I sat down to write an honest life update, so here we go. July’s been heavy, messy, weirdly hopeful, and exhausting all at the same time. That’s real life though, right?
Facing Bankruptcy (and Anxiety)
Earlier this month, I had my second appointment with the bankruptcy attorney to file Chapter 7. Walking into that office felt like dragging a hundred pounds of invisible weight. My mom couldn’t come with me that day, and that absolutely threw me. I didn’t realize how much I rely on having someone I trust nearby until I was sitting there trying to process legal talk that felt like it was in another language.
The woman helping me finally noticed I was struggling, and I handed her my autism card that explains I sometimes need things repeated or said more clearly. Honestly? That was a small win for me. Asking for help instead of masking my way through confusion isn’t easy, but I did it.
I still don’t remember a lot of what happened during that meeting. Anxiety turns memories into static sometimes. What I do remember is they gave me a packet to look over, and they’ll email me once everything is officially filed. I did have to take a hydroxyzine to calm down after, but I got through it—and that counts.
Health Battles & New Meds
In the middle of all this, I’ve been dealing with my usual health chaos: high blood pressure that doesn’t always behave, severe sleep apnea, insomnia, and my new adventure of trying sertraline for anxiety and depression. It’s only been a couple of weeks, and there’s always that fear in the back of my mind about side effects, but so far, so okay. My heart rate still dips into the 50s when I’m sitting, which freaks me out sometimes, but my doctors know and are keeping an eye on it.
One thing I’ve realized lately: how quick I am to blame myself when my body or brain doesn’t cooperate. I’ve been trying to practice more patience and kindness toward myself. Some days, that looks like using my weighted blanket, stim toys, or just letting myself step away when I’m overwhelmed. Other days, it means pushing through, even if I have to pause a hundred times.
Work, Writing & Quiet Wins
Work has been complicated, too. I had this moment where I felt overlooked for a promotion, and it stung—not because I really wanted the role, but because it felt like maybe my autism and mental health struggles made me less visible or “less than” in their eyes. Logically, I know I bring value, but emotionally? It’s hard. I’m trying to hold space for that disappointment without letting it define me.
Amid all of this, I’ve been writing more. Journaling helps me sort the noise into words, even if the words aren’t always pretty. My blog, Chronicles of a Quiet Fighter, has become this small, steady place where I can be real about the good days, bad days, and everything in between. It helps me remember that even on days when my anxiety screams louder than my hope, I’m still moving forward.
What’s Next?
So, what’s next? More deep breaths, more writing, more showing up—even if it’s messy. I’ll keep logging my blood pressure and heart rate in my Royal Scrolls of Heartbeat & Honor, keep talking about the hard stuff in therapy, and keep reminding myself (and maybe you, too) that strength isn’t about never struggling—it’s about still trying, even when we do.
Thanks for being here and reading my rambling updates. If you’re struggling right now too, please know you’re not alone. We’ve got this—even if “this” looks different for everyone.
Until next time,
Caleb 🌙✨
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