When a Friend Quits Without Saying Goodbye: Processing Loyalty, Grief, and Chosen Family

When Loyalty Hurts: A Goodbye I Never Got

I wasn’t prepared to lose Mikey like this.
He didn’t die. He just… disappeared.
Turned off his phone. Didn’t show up for work Saturday. No call. No warning. Just gone.

He finally texted Sunday. Said he quit.
That he’d been planning it for two weeks.
But I didn’t know.
Not me. Not any of us at work.

The customers knew, though.
Let that sink in.

I thought he was one of my safe people.
One of the few I could unmask around.
I laid my soul bare with him—shared things I don’t tell just anyone.
I don’t open up easy, and when I do, it’s not halfway.
It’s all or nothing. And with Mikey, I gave it all.

Now I’m sitting here, wondering why everyone I open up to eventually leaves.

It’s not just sad. It’s grief. It’s confusion. It’s betrayal.
And yeah—my eyes are leaking.
That’s how my body processes this kind of thing.
I guess it’s funny in a way. I wasn’t expecting a plot twist like this at work.
But here we are.

Ryan, my boss, can tell something’s off. He’s walking on eggshells around me.
And I don’t want to be treated like I’m fragile… but I am hurting.
This isn’t about someone quitting.
It’s about someone I trusted choosing silence over honesty.

Maybe he didn’t know how much it would affect me.
Maybe he did.

Either way, I’m left trying to pick up the pieces of a connection I thought was real.

I still have Miranda. I still have John.
I still have a beating heart that chooses connection, even when it hurts.

And I still believe I deserve people who stay.
Even if my eyes are leaking right now.

---

A Letter to Miranda and John

Dear Miranda and John,

You two are all I have left of our friend group at work.
I’ve lost two people who were deeply important to me—but I’m forever grateful that y’all are still here with me.

The honest truth is, you’ve always been my core friends.
The ones I’ve leaned on the most.
Miranda, thank you for everything you’ve done for me over the years. You’ve helped me find the light during some of my darkest moments.
And John, you are the wisdom I never knew I needed—steady, thoughtful, and wise beyond your years.

Y’all are my ohana.
Chosen family.
And I love y’all forever.

—Caleb

"When you find people who don’t ask you to hide your spark, those are your people."
— Neurodivergent Wisdom